Photography in the Making

Here are some samples of my work;

My beautiful Sister and I 

My beautiful niece, Carrie

Forgiveness

I think forgiveness is an amazing thing, but in all honesty it's one of the toughest thing I have ever had to work on. This year we had a program called Life Action come to our church and God revealed to me unforgiveness in my heart that I had buried and I had no idea was there. It was turning me bitter. I'm thankful God showed me because it's something I needed to deal with. I am still working on it and it's really hard. It isn't easy for me to let go of hurt in my past and to let go of what people have done to hurt me. In my heart, I know it is what God is calling me to do or He wouldn't have revealed it to me. In fact, even without revealing it, it is what God asks us to do. To forgive. Christ forgave us, how can we not give that gift to other people in our lives. I am reminded of the passage where Peter asks Jesus how many time he should forgive his brother. 7 times? Jesus tells Peter not 7 times, but 77 times. (Matthew 18:21-22) He is saying that we should always forgive. No matter what. No Excuses. No Exceptions.

I was thinking today and realized how bad our world would be without forgiveness. Could you possible imagine a Mother or Father refusing to forgive their child[ren] because they did something wrong? This world would be chaos, let alone survive if there wasn't forgiveness. If we didn't have forgiveness families would be broken and wouldn't stay a family, friends wouldn't last very long. We are human, we aren't perfect, we make mistakes. We NEED forgiveness. God knows we need forgiveness and it's so important to God he has it throughout the bible. In the beginning of the bible, Genesis talks about two brothers, Jacob and Esau. Isaac, the father, was close to death and the older child would get the inheritance. Jacob and Esau were twins, but Esau came out first. Jacob wanted the big inheritance and Rebecca, the mother, helped Jacob with the scheme to fool Isaac into giving Jacob the inheritance. Jacob ended up running for his life, but returned many years later. Jacob was scared but when Esau and Jacob met, Esau showed Jacob forgiveness. 

There is probably times in life where you may have done something wrong and was scared to tell the truth. Sometimes people give you a reaction you wouldn't except, like Esau did with Jacob. 

Where is the Joy?

I don't know about you but I struggle with keeping my emotions in place and keeping focused on Jesus. Emotions are a tricky thing when it comes to women. I find it easy to let them control you and to lean towards the thoughts of unhappiness and depression when there actually are so many reason to be joyful.

So the question is, what do you do when you really can't find a reason to be joyful? When everything seems to be falling apart in your life?

Sometimes our situation are less than we expect. When someone dies, when your bank account says low, when you fight with your parent or spouse constantly, when you may face abandonment, poverty, abuse or a loss, what is there to be joyful about?

It's always tempting to be depressed and lack the faith, to just throw your hands up in the air and think that you have been defeated, that you'll never find joy again. 

When you are at that point, it's when Christ strength and passionate love comes in. We won't ever be joyful in and of ourselves. When we are faithless, God is faithful! When we are weak, God is strong! 

God is faithful; 2 Timothy 2:13 "If we are faithless, he remains faithful, for he cannot deny himself" 

God is strong; 2 Corinthians 12:9 "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me."

I think sometimes in our life we have to admit that life is tough. It doesn't make you less of a Christian because you're struggling. I have found that we are not struggling to find joy because God IS joy. God is joy just as He is love, and if you are in Him, you are covered.

Where do you find the joy in circumstance? You don't need to find it, the joy is already yours if you have Christ. Even when situations aren't the greatest, remember that you have a Savior who is the joy and who gives us life! 

When the Light is Missing

I haven't blog in a while and I haven't been able to find the words. My mind has exploded and the fragments that were once thoughts are everywhere. I know that I have taken 2 steps back and have been waiting for the step forward and waiting for my thoughts to stick back together in order but it hasn't come. It may be that I haven't been attending my youth group and not surrounding myself around other Christians, maybe it's distancing myself from people I am/was close to, who I use to see every week and won't talk to them, maybe it's not being in counseling... It could be multiple things. The darkness crept in without warning and the light started to disappear and then I knew depression was going to hit once again.


I use to feel incredibly guilty if I missed youth group or missed church. I haven't been to church in which feels like forever. I haven't went to youth group in weeks, it's been at least over a month. I have been to church on Sunday, but I feel like I am not connected to anything there, so I choose not to go. I know that I am distant from God once again in my life, but I have kept that a secret, no one notices if you don't see them. I have used the excuse that I have to babysit, it's not a lie, I do babysit Wednesday nights at 5:30. I don't have to, as the mother has another babysitter. I just would rather choose to babysit then to go to youth group. I feel I need a break from it, not a break from God, but a break from there. I can surround myself with His word at home, not the fellowship that youth group brings, but God's word. I just feel like I have lost so much joy with everything that has come up in my life that I can't even force myself to put on a fake smile. Church shouldn't be a place to fake a smile but to go to other believers and ask for prayer. I just haven't been able to do that.

Everyone has points where they feel low and don't have much energy. That is part of having these weak, human bodies. People can feel like it's just a gloomy day and can't feel much joy. Some people don't know why they feel depressed or what they call "the blues" or feel like they lost the joy they once had. It's depressing in general to know you had such happiness at one point and you no longer have it. It's more depressing to know that these things we think make us so happy, will not last. God is what you need to be to have true happiness. I have lost sight of that the past 2 month. Depression is just a phase, and that is why I haven't gone to my church or have gone to people I usually do. I feel like such a burden to even ask for prayer, as depression seems like such a pointless thing to pray for but yet it's something I struggle with and I know that I need prayer. I have prayed to God to help me out of this depression, this darkness, but what I have learned is that He will pull me out of this darkness and into the light once it's His perfect time.

So I will kneel at the foot of the cross, pray, worship, weep, or smile. I will just remember that God will bring me out of this darkness and back into the light once again.